Just Information - Final Phase of Forgiveness

I've had many comments during this series of the Forgiveness Process, thanking me for the information and they were not published due to purely link dropping.  Well the Early Phase of the Forgiveness Process was certainly more than information - there was an "how to" which one would normally not only pay but make the time to attend for a week-end. Yet it was given here for free, but from the few questions and the comments, no one seemed to want to make the time. So my post previous to this is only information which will be continued today for the Final Phase.


Step 11 - how to heal yourself.  Step 12 How to heal the relationship  Step 13 Grounding the Forgiveness with "I will... "
Step 14 - Practising Patterns of Goodwill  Step 15 - Learning to Future Pace "the change"
Step 15 Checks to see if the Forgiveness is Complete   Step 16 - The Maintenance of the Forgiveness.

Phew, that was fast. Tell me would you want a heart surgeon to spend the minimum time when operating on you? Or would you want the car mechanic  to spend very little time on your impaired engine? Did I hear a loud  No! So why oh why, do you expect to go so fast on yourself in  the Forgiveness Process and get disappointing results? Yet it is a choice only you can make. Remember, recent studies have show a long list of health issues and diseases both physical and mental that cleared up, once forgiveness was given a chance.

EFT and Forgiveness will be in the next post as this was longer than I expected.

PNicholas

Your Request to your Higher Self? - Step 4 & 5

Are  you seated? Good - Now take your large sheet of paper or exercise book and write this formula
   Dear Higher Self,
I ask forgiveness for...........................................(specify one behavior or faulty belief or faulty thought which trouble you and for which you are seeking forgiveness.) (Dr. Guy Pettitt)
The above formula will be repeated for each behavior or belief, ah.... you were trying to squeeze 3 or 4 in one line - no need for that - use several sheets of paper as necessary.Leave several blank spaces between each item you're asking forgiveness for.

Oh are you having trouble seeing the less obvious areas for self-forgiveness.. These posts do not allow me to elaborate in detail as I would if I was coaching or guiding you individually or if you were in a small unbiased group setting. The less obvious might be - 1.overachieving, overambitious, (& the opposites),2. spending more money on your material possessions than on your own self-improvement, 3. putting expectations on others, 4. believing others as untrustworthy because of a past experience of others betraying your trust....etc.... REMEMBER ask and answer the questions, Compassionately, Joyfully and Completely. If this section is not done thoroughly, the forgiveness will be only partial..... so check,recheck, and recheck.

Take several days to do this as each day might bring something you forgot the day before. Recheck this big offenders. 1.Did I criticize myself and /or others? 2.Did I sabotage myself and/or others? 3.Did I addict myself and/or others? 4. Did I confuse myself and/or others?5. Did I play the clown to avoid important issues?6. Did I play the Helpless Victim, reluctant Martyr or resentful helper? 7. Did I depress myself for doing any of the above?

Step 5 is where you left the blank space. Return to each item to be forgiven and chose a wise preference with this formula. Do not use vague or negative words. When finished writing, say them loudly.

" As I look back, I realize I would have preferred to have.......(believe) or (thought) or (said) or (acted) Choose the one that applies. Here is an example.
 .....I would have preferred to believe that I was a worthwhile person. ( instead of being so self-critical of my background.)
 Please do this exercise sitting down - I will tell you why in the next post, where we will talk about the sixth step which concludes the Early Phase of Forgiveness! If you're still with me, please let me know! I would like to know how many are following these posts, otherwise the middle and very important part of the forgiveness process will be postponed indefinitely. So a line or two is crucial to the survival of this blog.
P Nicholas



               

Are you the Inner Critic? the Saboteur? or

Are you the Inner Victim?   the Helpless and Confused?

To understand Step 4, you have to learn about the 3 distinct energy fields or configurations that constitute You, Me and Everyone Else.  The first is the Lower Self - your physical, mental and emotional. From the Lower Self comes the sub-personalities that I've mentioned at the introduction, these are unfortunately the dominant ones, although there are others that are perhaps more supportive but passively, waiting for you to develop them. The Lower Self is compared by Dr. Pettitt as the actors in a play.

The second is the Personal Self and the third is one that I believe brought you to these posts, the Higher Self or the Soul which has a significant link with the Source, Creator or Divinity. We will return to the Higher Self in the next post.

Everyone is aware of and attuned to the Lower Self, as it is where Basic Needs are Met. What if the Basic Needs are not met, ah that is when your sub-personality is formed. Are you still with me? Hope so.... as this is very significant. I spent a vast amount of time, trying to figure the best way to give you an example of the sub-personalities mentioned above. Let me introduce them. Some might be very familiar to you. I know some were to me.

You came upon these posts  on  Forgiveness some weeks ago right? See if any of these characters showed up in your conversation with self...........

Inner Victim - "Even if I did forgive,  those bosses of mine, all take their turns in tormenting me over and over again? So what's the point?"    This personality began early, perhaps in school, where you were bullied, etc..and this cast member is looking for empowerment.

Inner Critic -  "Bah, who am I kidding? Only saints are able to forgive and I'll never be perfect enough to forgive?"         This character was formed when as a child, you did not get approval and since it was formed at a time when you were getting criticized usually by an adult, it does not know how to approve but only criticizes your actions and thoughts excellently.

Confused and Helpless " Uggh..... all these steps are confusing, how many are they? How long is this going to take.... I better not start....wish someone could help me. Feel so helpless"     
This was formed when you needed clarity and found none. Don't be fooled by this actor asking for help, because it usually turns away, when help is under its nose.


 Saboteur - "just don't know about this Forgiveness thing. It could hurt me, seems risky.. Just safer to read about it and the comments. Perhaps that group she mentioned might give some feedback if it is really safe to do. Think it's much safer to observe from a distance."
This one was formed when you needed to feel safe and secure; as security was missing, again earlier in your life.

 These are all negative sub-personalities, yet they are the dominant ones in the majority of the population. As you do the Forgiveness Process, you will be training other positive sub-personalities that are lying dormant at present and giving these a positive lift up. These would support, encourage and empower you throughout the rest of your life.
The Lower Self is sometimes known as the Divided Self. How many times have you heard this - " I really don't like to do ?, yet I find myself doing it . The 2 pronoun "I" are each talking from a different sub-personality!

To keep the brevity of these posts, the Second Level of energy consciousness or configuration, the Personal Self will be discussed early next week and although this is weekly column, next week there will be 2 posts. Any questions or comments so far? Could you relate to the above or do you have other sub-personalities to share?? Try to have some fun doing this. Expose these sub-personalities with Compassion & with Joy.
PNicholas